New Year…same old me.
For the last 4 years I have not set a single new year resolution (here is last years new year post). This year I have not even given myself an expectation as to how I will change over the year! January is a month for hibernation. Almost always, the coldest, greyest and hardest month of the year. Yet we use it to make big changes? Its bonkers. I take my time in January to see how things settle. My mum died in January 4 years ago, it certainly changed my perspective and many things happened that year to teach me how to live. To live each day the best I can, not as fast as I can.
Last year I did a huge amount of work on releasing fear, anger and resentment. It culminated in me taking a huge stand for myself and walking away from the clinic I was working in to be me. So why would I want to make a list of things I want to change? Every year I try to urge others to wait for spring to make big changes. Otherwise, use January/February to be kind to yourself, to recharge and be ready to renew.
I recently read something from someone else about being mediocre. “Do you want to live a mediocre life?”. I have taken time to think about this. I have always answered “NO WAY” to this in the past. The answer I have come up for now is this.
Yes, right now I am absolutely comfortable with being mediocre. Anyone who knows me will be surprised at my answer. Yeah right, the Louise who loves the stage, the limelight, who wants everyone to want and need her around.
Don’t get me wrong, I still know I am brilliant! I know how much I can help others and the world around me, however, right now I am ok with not doing that. Especially not in the same way as I have before. I have been so angry over the years, with the way the world works. Lies, propaganda and corporate greed are a fact of life. YES every small step we take towards change will change our world. Every time we take a look within ourselves and get a little closer to gratitude and self love there is a huge energy shifts around us. These changes are sustainable, these changes are for life. So I am hoping to make mediocre changes this year. Be smaller and quieter in what I say and definitely, how I say it.
Mediocre is often kinder. it is less pushy and demanding, less bright and bold. Maybe thats what the majority of us need right now. We all know what we need to do to be happier- it is all around us, everyone pushing and shoving to get you to use their way to self-love, health, happiness and (of course still all we want is…) the perfect body. For now I am going to be me. I have not got the perfect body or the perfect solutions. I do have a huge bunch of tools to help you to find yours. I can use my small ways to help you to find beyond mediocre. However I choose not to push my way in front of you, for you to find me and me to help guide you to yourself.
I will take my time slowly and carefully, watching and waiting. There is huge opportunity to be found in 2016. There is no rush, no deadline to be brilliant. Once you take that pressure away, see what you need and really want. What will your body tell you when you take away this forced need to be something else. Where will you go, what will you experience. I have not been anywhere since Easter (apart from Macau, but that is a home from home). Normally I would have really itchy feet, need to be and go and see. I am really feeling more grounded, secure and safe being in the same place for more than a couple of months. Finding the holiday in the everyday rather than living full speed ahead to breaks. So am I happy being average, steady and contained, for now I am.
2016 will be full of ups and downs, just like all the years before it. I am looking forward to what comes my way. I have taken January to be quiet, hibernating, preparing for the opportunity and life of spring and summer. I have catered to my needs and been happy to be out of the spotlight- for now!
How about you, are you content with mediocre?